How to Not Lose a Wedding Ring with ADHD, ASD, & Other Common Challenges
- Jessica Levey
- 4 hours ago
- 6 min read
Whether you just woke up sweating from a vivid dream about losing your wedding ring, or you’re constantly forgetting where you put your new engagement ring – you know that standard advice for not losing jewelry doesn’t work.
‘Out of sight, out of mind’ is par for the course for most ADHD folks, as well as for many ASD, AuADHD and other neurodivergent folks. But other disabilities make standard advice like “Don’t take your rings off and you can’t lose them!” or “Always leave your ring in the same place” totally unhelpful too. Sensory sensitivities can have you taking your rings off five or ten times a day, wherever you happen to be. If arthritis causes your fingers to swell, you might take your ring off for days or weeks at a time – and have no idea which “safe place” you left it. Add in working memory deficits caused by dozens of other conditions, and you’re suddenly rushing from room to room in a frenzy.
Below are a few suggestions for how to keep track of your beloved rings, even if a physical or neurological condition makes you prone to losing things.
Single Ring Holder Versus Multiple Ring Holders
People who love routine often prefer having multiple ring holders or ring dishes placed in intentional places at home or work – one next to every sink, or one right next to the bed. On the other hand, people with unpredictable sensory issues or an aversion to routine can benefit from a single ring holder that’s with them wherever they go. (AuADHDers and folks with cyclical disorders, you relate to both, sorry.) Depending on your needs, here are some cool options to try:
Multiple ring holder strategy (for folks who need flexible structure or routine-free solutions)
First, figure out where to place your holders! For a week, place a colorful sticky note every place you remove your ring in your home, office, car, or yard. Mark the post-it every time you use this location. Then, put a ring holder in all the places with the most post-its to build a safety net around the flow you’ve already established.
Already know the most common areas you leave your rings? Buy a ring holder set (or ring dish set) and place them where you need them.
PRO TIP: If you’re AuADHD or need written cues, adding signs beside a ring dish can help. For example, I like to place handwritten signs next to my holders that say “Put your rings here!” And I change the colors on these signs every couple months to keep them from becoming an “invisible” common object.
Single ring holder – fixed place strategy (for folks who thrive on routine and habit):
Some people love routine. If that’s you, then standard advice can sometimes work: always put your rings in the designated dish before you wash your hands, go to bed, etc. Consider a ring box with a lid for extra security, a ceramic mug that’s hard to knock over for a cozy DIY aesthetic, or try a decorative ring dish / ring cone holder.
PRO TIP: For AuADHD folks who struggle with conflicting needs, consider changing up your ring holder based on the season. Rotating the pattern or shape of the dish can feed the ADHD need for novelty, while keeping the dish in the exact same fixed spot satisfies the autistic need for spatial consistency.
Single ring holder – mobile strategy (for folks on the go or fluctuating sensory needs):
Consider a ‘ring holder’ that comes with you everywhere you go – a necklace or bracelet that holds your ring when it’s not on your finger. For the options below, you can purchase elegantly designed designer products, indie artisan variations, or make your own super affordable DIY versions.
(While researching this article, I discovered most people lose their rings while traveling for work or vacations. Makes sense! It also makes a mobile ring holder an excellent tool, even if you usually use a fixed-place one. If you travel often, consider ring dishes around the house as well as a ring holder necklace. You can see the exact stats for how many people lose their rings and when in the bonus section at the bottom of the article.)
Ring Holder Necklace:
Sometimes called a ‘ring keeper’ necklace, these beautiful necklaces are designed to hold one or more rings on a sleek, curved pendant. They come in a few styles, but the most popular are those that don't require any unclasping to use; simply slip the ring onto the necklace, and it will be right where you left it when you’re ready to put it back on.
If you’re like me (frugal, crafty, and hate the feel of metal on your neck) you can DIY a ring holder necklace using a fabric cord instead. This method does require untying the cord of course, but it's also free.
PRO TIP: Choose a ring holder necklace in the same metal and karat as your ring. Harder metals can scratch softer metals, and there’s a risk of color transfer if a gold or silver ring hangs against a dark copper or bronze for a long time.
Here are two different examples of ring holder necklaces (I'm not affiliated with these brands). The first is a classic gold design by @mcleanandcojewellers / @sunshinecoastjeweller:
And this modern indie silver option by @circle_j_rings:
Ring Holder Bracelet:
I'm not usually a bracelet person, so I didn’t know this piece of jewelry existed until researching this article - what a great and creative solution to stop losing your rings! Several artists on Etsy make fabric or leather ‘window’ bracelets, which snap around your ring and secure it like a charm. (Kind of the way a traditional wrist watch is designed.)
Here's an example of a ring holder bracelet (I'm not affiliated with this brand, just love the design):
Bubble Locket / Deep Floating / Keepsake Locket:
An oversized keepsake locket or bubble locket that's wide and deep enough to hold a ring can be a gorgeous place to store a ring – just make sure its latch is tight and secure. One drawback to this option is that it may not work well for people with Dyspraxia, arthritis, or other small motor difficulties, because locket clasps that are secure also require dexterity to open and close. What we love most about this option is that lockets are trendy and stunning on their own, making it a good option for everyday wear.
Lockets that are large enough to fit a ring are more difficult to find than ring keeper necklaces, but here's an example of what to look for (I'm not affiliated with this product):
A Caveat: Some Standard Advice Should Always Be Followed
Sure, some generic advice doesn't work for disabled folks. But some common tips are fantastic and should be followed, no matter what other personal factors are involved. For example:
Always make sure your rings are sized correctly. A loose ring is a doomed ring. I wrote about this in more detail in an article for American Marriage Ministries: Size Matters: Engagement Ring Sizing, Fit & Resizing Tips
Always purchase ring insurance for your engagement and wedding rings, or any other special jewelry you wear. It can't replace the sentimental value of a lost ring, but you will be very glad to have it if you're one of the 1-in-5 who lose or damage their rings. (Considering 1 in 5 people have a disability, you know what those odds look like in practice! Please get insurance.)
Our last tip?
Wear a sensory friendly wedding ring to reduce the amount of times you remove it throughout the day. I’ve gathered some great suggestions and examples here: Sensory-Friendly Wedding Rings: Comfort Tips for Autistic Couples
BONUS SECTION: Interesting Ring Facts
If you love statistics and facts, this bonus section’s for you!
How many people lose their engagement rings?
A few online sources put the number at around 20% – meaning that one in five people lose their engagement ring over the course of their lifetime.
The number isn’t that far off for wedding rings. According to an old Newsweek survey, “Nearly 24 percent of men admitted to losing their [wedding] ring, compared to 14.3 percent of women.” Make of that what you will!
Where are most engagement rings lost?
According to the insurance company Jewelers Mutual, “50% [of those surveyed] lost their ring during work travel. 38% lost their ring while vacationing…Our study suggests water is the largest culprit of engagement ring losses, with 25% of losses occurring in an ocean or lake and 27% in a pool.”
Our takeaway from this revealing survey? Having a mobile ring holder is a great idea when you’re away from home, whether you're traveling for fun, or for personal and work obligations. And no matter what, take extreme caution with your rings when swimming!